Realization...

Today I had the kids take the trash cans outside and clean them, we use liners but you know it gets dirty down there! So I said go outside and put water in the trash cans, add soap and more water, let is sit a minute and then start scrubbing.

They were aghast.

Me think they need to learn how to work.

I have them do a lot of chores but they don't do the nitty gritty cleaning.

When I was little I remember Saturday being chore day. My mom would make a list for each of us and there were big boxes and when we accomplished the chores we could check them off.

We loved checking them off.

Anyhoo... I know I cleaned out the garbage can a time or two. I know I did plenty of dishes, I know I weeded and I know I wiped down the counters, cabinets and appliances with something-- maybe Soft Scrub?

I know we cleaned out own rooms, I know we did laundry and I know we dusted.

But I cant always remember what we did when.. I mean how old is old enough to do a certain chore?

I used to think when they could do it right-- guess how that's working for me?

I guess it is if they CAN... are they tall enough, are they strong enough, can they reach, can the remember all the steps?

So I was wiping down the wall today because we are painting tomorrow and I had been working hard for about an hour- I was sweating and scrubbing and scrubbing and sweating! Matt walked in the kitchen and said MOM do you want me to work on that? SWEETNESS. I said absolutely, gave him a quick run down on the job and got up to go. I left the room and 5 min later he comes strolling out of the kitchen and I am like ARE YOU DONE? He said yes. I let it go-- I mean truly his heart did mean to be sweet, right?

I went back later and finished up.

Should I have made him to the job right? NO, I don't think so, it wasn't a learning situation, he sweetly asked to help. If I got upset that he didn't do it properly or didn't finish... wont I hurt his heart to help?

On the other hand, shouldn't he learn to do a job right?

SO.HARD.BEING.A.PARENT.

 If all seems so "almost" life and death.

When are we teaching them or not teaching them something that will affect their life long term?

What if that was my moment to teach and I wasted it?

What if I wasted a moment of him learning compassion by teaching?

Tough stuff.

It all boils down to, listening to the promptings of the Holy Spirit to know when to hold em', know when to fold em' and know when to walk away. (but not the gambling kind- just the theory behind it!)

How do you decide when a child is ready for "x" chore?  Or "x" responsibility?